Things We Wrote On the Walls in My First Condo on the BeachScriptural quotes from Everett Fox’s translation of The Five Books of Moses, when possible, the KJV, other poetic translations, or my own otherwise. Ruach Elohim Ruach Elohim Ruach Elohim Breath of God Breath of God Ice cream every day God is the Aleph. God said, Bereshit—which I translate as “Let it begin with Beht.” The face of God wild over the deep, rushing-spirit of God hovering over the face of the waters-- God separated the light from the dark. And God called to me, calling the shadow under the roof of the Beht “safe.” And God sheltered all of creation and all that was to follow creation beneath the sheltering Beht, beneath the roof of the beginning of His Beginning, Bereshit. God sheltered all the letters that appeared before Him before beginning the creating, so the letters for the creating would be as safe as the Word itself together with the light & the dark the waters & the land the fish & the beasts the heavens & the earth. And God made us on the last day of God’s creating. God blessed us. There was setting, there was dawning: the sixth day. John said later or at the same time or is yet to say, In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. David sang, He makes me to lie down in fields of tender grasses. He leads me beside the living water. He restores my soul. David sang, Yea! Though I walk through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I shall fear no harm, using the ancient syllable ra, meaning physical harm, not evil. The labor of women in childbirth comes to mind when we read ra because there is no spiritual harm. Childbirth. The beginning of Woman’s love. In the same way, Israel only meant the man (Ish) fought (ra) with God (El). God gave Jacob a new name on the bank of the river where they fought. Jacob fought with God in the way that some people are born to fight with God. Like me. I am not a fighter, though. I just am. I do not fear harm from God. All I want is to cross the river together. To be closer. And no, I’m not afraid to fight You for the right. A new name. I needed two new hips when I was still quite young. We love and we labor we live and we die and most of us love children. A woman makes love without fear of giving birth when it could so easily kill her. Women are born to love the child whether we or she loves or dies. A daughter is our beginning; she is our Word. Your Word; my word. Daughter, I am your Beht and the sky that shelters you; it will always be so. My friend Katanya told me she had a dream: I got a letter. It said “Katanya. Feed my sheep.” Three times. God had a door to His workshop, where He had written His words and equations and the Calculus and some measurements. Now the door is lost. How does a door get lost? Somehow, the words and the Calculus I adore are still in the doorway—anyone can see them passing from one life to another. Solomon said, Lean not unto thine own understanding.
Notes for a sort of bilingual poem:
1. Ruach Elohim means “Breath of God.” 2. God is the Aleph, which is why the creation does not begin with Aleph. 3. Bereshit is the first word of the Torah, and it is usually translated as “In the beginning,” or “At the beginning.” Bereshit starts with the second Hebrew letter, Beht, which looks like a backwards squared off C, and Hebrew is read right to left, so that is why I say all of creation is sheltered inside it. 4. Before the creation began, all the Hebrew letters presented themselves to God on fire in a beautiful ceremony (Hebrew folklore). Only after God has the letters can God begin with the creating, which is why the Word is so powerful. 5. The word ra simply meant physical harm. 6. Ish means man, El means god. So Israel means “man wrestles with God,” which is exactly what Jacob did all night long on the other side of the river from where Rachel has just had her baby. He would not let the angel go until the angel told him his name, which he refused to do, or blessed him. For some part of this, God touched Jacob’s hip and hurt it. After this event, God changed Jacob’s name to Israel. This was a compliment. 7. Near the end of the Gospels, God asked Peter to feed his sheep three times. Most people think we are the sheep. Peter became the first leader of the Church. 8. I shall fear no evil is from the 23rd psalm, KJV. 9. He makes me to lie down in fields of tender grasses is a better translation of Psalm 23. 10. In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God is the way the Gospel of John begins. 11. Lean not unto thine own understanding: Proverbs 3:5-6 KJV. FEED
tame, obsession, sweetheart, defenestrate, mistral, always. now always may have come cunningly from obsession through sweetheart, but who’s counting, and i love to say but who’s counting, for those who are counting-- liver typewriter feed-- not paws: from feed to dog to paws, no so we have feed, notebook, which isn’t fair because there’s a notebook in my peripheral vision; sand is not fair either since i live on the beach and neither is yellow which is the color of the stripes on the highway, so i am on feed. i am not off my feed. which reminds me of the next-door neighbor’s pig in a poem i love called “gossip: a fiction.” Santa Ana
To set you on fire flying up I’ll make love to you tender my long hair loving- kindling loosed by the timbre of wounded ties then send you to sleep until I decide it’s time to send you off you’ll hear me I’ll breathe windows to shatter your soul to the tenth circle of hell with a proper Girl Scout bonfire you’re all I need, sweetheart you and that little spark of incense We are a furious wind I’ll show you a furious wind I will become Santa Ana herself blow a firestorm to char the heart and fuse the bones what we’ll do, you see, is set you on fire. If that sounds harsh, I apologize. Sometimes a girl has to do what a woman needs to do. Jennifer Woodworth studied creative writing at Old Dominion University. She is the author of the chapbook, How I Kiss Her Turning Head, published by Monkey Puzzle Press. Her stories poems, and essays have appeared in Scoundrel Time, Gone Lawn, The Citron Review, The Eastern Iowa Review, Bending Genres, and Jokes Literary Review, and Science Write Now!, among others. She was a nominee for a 2020 Best Micro Fiction, won first place in AROHO’s first “Orlando” Sudden Fiction contest, and a Writer’s Award in Poetry from Nassau Review. She has a new prose poem about fish* upcoming from Gone Lawn this September. She was a mathematician in a former life, and still is, now and then, as she adores the interplay of art and logic wherever she sees it play out.
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