B1919+21after the cover of Joy Division’s “Unknown Pleasures” I breathe like a pulsar I stand still & airless ready to be picked up by the scruff of my neck I spin so regularly my dizzy spells catch up with your blink I taste the carpet hoping that I will reach you in the darkest pockets of the universe when I fall I leave smaller versions of me like a supernova explosion in Lilliput if I look up I see a ball of dust & acne instead of the sun if I look down I see my veinwork spooling into yours eighty wiggly lines a black & white data graph of me staying Lines for Greeting Cards with no AddresseePlease scare my hiccups away. I asked you to feed me, not lure me with abdominal tattoos. A candy bouquet keeps me going. A Care Bear will lovingly maul you. The belt you tie round my throat reminds me to breathe in squares. I’ll always tiptoe my way back. A pony version of Jesus told me to love and tolerate. My skin reads your touch as medium-fine. Grumpy Bear taught me how to hug someone who doesn’t exist. The centre of the earth will hold me down and stop me from flying into you. The Forest of Feelings is where I hewed your name into a casket. I look for you between the day and the night. Like a glass eye. Like a ghost missing sweat. Like a smiley face on the edge of nothing. Dampyou should never mix bleach with ammonia yet you do because I keep coming back all septic & needy you leave the house fearing I would bring down the walls at night I embrace you like a spider that creeps up when no one looks I hunch over the drain to whip out my hair how grey your fingers turn when you scrub my back you wish me softer than a blast of dry ice each time you hold a sponge & a knife my name spreads bleeding through your lungs yet you still breathe me in high doses Italo Ferrante (he/him) is a queer poet who earned a BA in English Literature and Creative Writing from the University of Warwick. He is currently undertaking an MA in Creative Writing at Lancaster University. To date, his work has been selected for publication by Poetry Salzburg, Impossible Archetype, Cardiff Review, Sage Cigarettes, Inflections Magazine, Lighthouse, and Orchard Lea Press.
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